2.05.2009

Bastardy

What the shit happened to the weather around this place? Prior to the 10,000 calorie Superbowl death party, the sun was shining and the dirt-people were out throwing frisbees or whatever the deuce people toss around when they can't throw a football. Now some 96 hours hence, it's colder than balls on Mr. Brass Monkey.

Yours truly is officially over winter. We've drank our way through the cold...mild by most of the nation's standards, but enough to remind the locals that spring is around the corner.

We're water rats. As you can tell from posts made during last year, we prefer to be in a pool or on the lake. A few years ago, Frank McWoo and I went with a mutual friend to the annual boat show. We got torched on some beers and bourbon before heading inside(standard policy) and mingled among the vendors, customers, and onlookers like ourselves. We crawled all over every runabout, cabin cruiser, and pontoon boat we could find and noticed one common item:


Behold the thousand dollar cooler. Or at least that's what the itemized cost on the sticker told us. Nearly every boat had one of these Igloo marine bastards...and before you scoff, recognize that these things are monstrous...the larger ones being in the 250 quart capacity. That's a lot of beer, bourbon, rum, and I guess some crackers or sandwiches. Coolers this size are often a mixed blessing in the sense that while the boat's important beer-per-hour numbers are improved significantly, these monoliths require elbow grease and additional horsepower so that overall performance is not diminished. Hell, we have to adjust the smaller coolers we utilize to make sure the damn boat will stay planed. (we drink a lot out there)

A cursory search indicates that marine coolers are indeed in the hundreds of dollars price range, so we can all guess the pricing on the new boats were adjusted for haggling purposes...and indeed, to make a patron think twice about getting that bigger motor. Surely I can't justify spending a grand on this sumbitch, but I guarantee someone has.

Fuck, warm weather can't get here soon enough.

2 comments:

  1. C'mon man, that's prickish to talk of summer when it's so far away. Think baby steps, like a spring...break!

    ReplyDelete
  2. BCM. You get your Wednesdays and Thursdays mixed up.

    ReplyDelete