In which I speak briefly of Mardi Gras

So folks, here we are in February with that crippling romantic cack behind us and the rest of the drinking year ahead. Thus, a good number of you are celebrating Mardi Gras and therefore probably can't read this very well. We understand.

In fact, I'm going to totally mail this on in. Let's be honest, very few celebrants of MG that I've known care in the least about the traditions of this iconic party. Some make the pilgrimmage to New Orleans to do it proper, the rest of us fake it and get trashed locally. Meh. Beads are offered, boobs are shown, urination is public etc.

Allow me to compensate with a couple of esoteric MG favorites in case you are frigging sick of Hurricanes or Zombies:

Hand Grenade
1 1/2 oz gin
1/2 oz PGA
1/2 oz melon liquer(nasty)
1/2 oz rum
1/2 oz vodka

Collins class works well here. Shake it together. Some folks like to garnish. Personally I add my own touch by garnishing with double the recommended booze. Mackey would triple it because he's living in Glugtown USA.

Also an obscure seasonal recipe is the Creole:
2 oz. light rum
1 oz. lemon juice
1 dash Tabasco sauce
1 dash Worcestershire sauce
1/2 oz. Beef Bouillon
dash of salt
dash of black pepper
lemon slice

The usual order of pouring Bloody Mary-like drinks applies so I won't bother with the details here. Shake the mixture, then add the lemon slice. This is really just another supercharged Bloody Bull, but I suppose every region has them.

If you are going to New Orleans, then please tell the Saint's fans to sober up and get back to work.

Knoxville Booze News

Booze Controversy
from WATE Ch. 6

We have some actual booze news in Knoxville. WATE channel 6 posted a story on their website about a new restaurant opening in Fort Sanders that plans to sell alcohol, however the location of the new establishment is too close to a mosque to obtain a local beer permit. Luckily there may be a loophole that will allow them to get the permit if the state approves a liquor license. The article explains that state law doesn't have a distance requirement and that the local ordinance would be voided if a liquor license is approved. Excellent!!

I've been wondering what they were up to at the old Flynn Paint building and now we know, a new restaurant called The Hill. I really hope they approve the liquor license so we can have another option for downtown/campus food and drink. With no apologies to the mosque, or any church for that matter, I think we're past the days of antiquated ordinances for religious purposes. Let's hope this new restaurant opens without a hitch and gets the required permits. More importantly let's hope that it is worthwhile and a good addition to the Fort.

Alcohol Awareness

One of my favorite things about autumn in East Tennessee is that it seems to provide ample opportunities for drinking. Not that we don't drink a shitload of alcohol during the rest of the year, but in the fall, we seem to do it in groups a lot.

In fact, there are so many opportunities for Organized Boozing during the month of October, that I am hereby declaring it Knoxville Alcohol Awareness Month. Because, as I think everyone here would agree, it is important that we all be aware of the alcohol we are imbibing, or, at least, aware that we are imbibing alcohol. Whatever.

The following is a list of some of the alcohol-related events that I've heard about (and may or may not actually attend...depending on how drunk I've gotten beforehand); please feel free to add to the list by leaving a comment, if you know of something I've left out.

Friday, October 3rd: Wine on the Water.
For all of you winos out there, this is Knoxville's premier wine tasting event. Bonus: It's for charity. And who doesn't like to drink for charity.

Saturday, October 4th: Tennessee vs. Northern Illinois.
Is anyone actually going to the stadium for this game? No? Good, we can all meet at a bar and get drunk, as we watch the Vols attempt to actually win one.

Friday, October 10th: Cocktails in the Attic.
Hmmm...cocktails and an auction. Is this a bad idea? Better go and find out. Also, I love the L&N Station. It's such a neat and, in my opinion, underutilized building.

Saturday, October 11th: Brewers' Jam.
I don't need to say a lot about this event, as my colleague Tag Berauscht is doing a fucking miniseries on it. (Kidding, Tag! I'm loving your work so far.) I went to the BJ (hehe) last year and had a blast, so this year I'm just praying that we have good weather again. Because, World's Fair Park can be a bit of a mudpit when it rains.

Saturday, October 18th: Tennessee vs. Mississippi State.
At this point, the Vols are expected to have a 2-4 record. If that ain't an excuse to get together and drink (and boycott Fat Phil), then I don't know what is.

Sunday, October 19th: Hops and Hope 5K.
Let me get this straight: You run in a 5K, and at the end of it, you get to drink beer? Oh, I am so there. Unless, of course, I'm too hung over from the night before. It's a tough call.

Saturday, October 25th: Tennessee vs. Alabama.
One word: Belligerent.

Friday, October 31st: Halloween.
Okay, so I haven't actually listed a specific event here, but I'm sure there will be plenty to choose from. And, with Halloween finally on a decent day this year (the past three years, it was on Mon., Tues., and Wed., dammit), I might actually dress up. This will definitely be a fine night to cap off what looks to be an excellent month of drinking in Knoxville.

And with that...let the Organized Boozing begin!

A New Hope - Ft. Sanders Yacht Club

The Cumberland Avenue “strip” isn’t what it used to be. Everyone I’ve read and talked to agrees that it has declined right before our eyes the last decade or so. I’ll skip all my favorite bar memories and jump right into the best new place (bar) I’ve seen there in a long time.

Ft. Sanders Yacht Club is a “barcade” that has been open since spring and seems to have enough momentum to keep it going a while. Video games have taken over the planet. I hadn’t played one in a decade and haven’t had a gaming system since the Atari 2600, but FSYC has 1980’s era video games that I can still play and not have to relearn everything. Plus there’s a bar right in the corner selling beer! The bottled selection is pretty standard but still good enough for anybody to find something they can drink, and they have 3 beers on tap. Happy hour is 12 – 9 and I think they have a $2 bottle special all the time but I could be wrong (Sierra Nevada Porter was on special last time I went). All this and more can be found on their official website. The place isn't very big. It stretches narrowly from the entry to the back patio with arcade games lined on both sides, but it is comfortable enough and has a laid back vibe.

The thing I like best about this place is that it is owned and operated by some guys who went to UT, and that it isn’t a franchise. Or a chicken or sandwich shop. And they serve beer with a gimmick that works. I definitely need to improve my skills – my 14 year old self would be embarrassed by my pathetic scores at Dig Dug, Asteroids, Galaga, Tetris and even Ms. Pacman. I sucked at them all, but there are definitely more games I want to go back and play, while drinking. At 25c a game I can afford to get blown up or eaten alive as long as I catch a buzz while it happens. And don't act like you're too good for Dig Dug! You know you want to pump those little floating bastards full of hot air til they pop, and maybe excavate some rocks to fall on the dragon.

The Lost Art of the Pub Crawl

This purloined picture kicks ass, no?

Following on today's post regarding the legal drinking age and returning collegians, I began thinking about the time honored tradition of pub crawls. Generally, this could be a garden variety post that is not remarkable in the larger sense. Specifically though for Knoxville, it gets a little complex. (What a fucking surprise)

You see, back in the 1990's Knoxville and Knox County apparently didn't get the memo on urban sprawl. I'll spare you the noxious and overly technical accusations about finger annexations, zoning and the like and just say that this town isn't friendly to pub crawlers as a whole. Last Christmas, during the heyday of Whiskey Season the authors and some friends decided to resurrect this fun practice. It was okay, but failed to really achieve the goal of at least ten bars. We had a good crowd, but that sort of works against you when pubs are cloistered in regions that require either a driver, cab, or transportation other than one's feet. If you want to start way out west and work your way into downtown or the Old City, then pack a lunch and good fucking luck.

While waxing idiotic on my college days in the early/mid 90's I can remember getting close to twenty degenerate power drinkers and floozies together on the Strip and moving westward. Vintage bars like Hawkeyes, The Roman Room, Out-of-Bounds, Spicys(the very first one), The Lap, The Library, O'Chucks, Ruby Tuesdays(again, the first one before the chain sucked), Tap Room...all would be hit before ending up at OCI's. Those were the days. First, if you could stand at the bar you would get served...none of this pussified carding shit the law has now screwed us with(eat shit teenagers) and you could walk to each of them. These days, Knoxville is set up with little cliques and fiefdoms in sections of town that rarely interact with one another. It's provincial.

This really isn't a problem in other places, so I confess a bit of jealousy there. The good people at http://www.yourpubcrawl.com/ for example, can set you up with a nominal drinking tour of Edinburgh.

Not bad. I am sure other resources similar to this one are out there. Personally though, I just think that these things are best done by word of mouth, so motivation and a powerful sense of guile are needed. Grab a group of thirsty bastards and descend on several local bars like a MIRV:

If you do it correctly, you should leave the various bars in a similar state...that is to say, radioactive and utterly uninhabitable.

As football season nears along with the Whiskey Season, I encourage each of you to reclaim your honor by hitting every bar you can within one courageous night.

Southern Graces Skybox

UPDATE

According to my top-secret, inside source "Southern Graces Skybox" is the official name of the new bar in the Sunsphere. They plan to open their doors to the public in less than two weeks, so that should give us plenty of time to visit by football season. By visit I mean get drunk there.

The upscale bar area will face west toward UT campus/Ft. Sanders (see picture), have room for about 50-60 guests, and will have special gameday tailgating packages, etc. with TVs in case you don't have tickets to the game.

This is going to be awesome. Totally Awesome!!

Hooray – The Sunsphere has Booze!!

Or at least it will soon. Rumored ever since reopening the observation deck last year, the Sunsphere will soon open a public bar, hopefully in time for football season. I have been patiently awaiting this news for some time. A couple of days ago I bumped into a bartender friend who shared the good news. News made even better by that fact that he has been hired to work there! Man it feels good to know people with connections. He said all the inspections are complete, permits obtained, and hiring of staff is in progress.

The official word from City of Knoxville Beer Board:

SOUTHERN GRACES CATERING & EVENTS LLC , APPLICANT
SOUTHERN GRACES CATERING & EVENTS (CATERING)
810 CLINCH AVENUE
SOUTHERN GRACES CATERING & EVENTS, LLC , OWNER
ROBERT A. SUKENIK , MANAGER
TEMPORARY
Officer Donny Huskey, KPD Inspections, reported no applicable record on the applicant. Doti Martin, Revenue Office, reported that the file was complete.
Councilmember Pelot made a motion to approve the beer permit. Councilmember Roddy seconded the motion. By unanimous voice vote the motion carried. The beer permit was granted.

So there you have it. Now all we have to do is wait for them to open their doors so we can ascend via the slow-ass elevator for some uptown drinkin’. A word of warning – this ain’t gonna be no cheap watering hole. As you can imagine there are space and logistic limitations, not to mention the notion of upholding an image of prestige and decorum. This bar will cater to high-end business types, convention visitors, and snooty well-to-dos. Expect pricey bottled beer (no drafts), fine wines, a selection of top shelf booze and probably some fancy cocktails on their drink menu. I haven’t heard anything about their food menu, nor do I care to. I have no idea what it will be called or if it will operate under their catering operation, Southern Graces. I hope they call it something different, something cool. Sunsphere Saloon? P-card Pub? (doubtful) Downtown Drinkup? Okay, those really suck balls. Got a good name suggestion? Post it in a comment and we’ll see if anybody comes up with something good. Go ahead, don’t be bashful…

Museum of the American Cocktail

Hey everybody - ever get behind schedule at work? Or how 'bout those chores at home like cleaning the garage or simply taking out the trash? Yeah, us too. Sometimes there is a legitimate excuse, most of the time it's pure laziness. We here at Drinking Knoxville are no different. We are very lazy. Add that to the fact we're drunk most of the time too and it's easy to fall behind on things. I'm not going to bullshit you - I've got nothing to say here. That is why I've provided a link to the Museum of the American Cocktail.

Granted this has nothing to do with Knoxville, but if you're going to New Orleans (one of my favorite drinking towns) or New York it might be worth the $10 admission to check it out. I'm particularly impressed with the tabletop still in the Exhibit section. Check it out here.