Day of Rage IV

So this is a few months late but it's not like we are on top of things around here lately. This year went slightly better than 2014, meaning no bodily harm to any participants. There were three finalists this year, not four. Order of finishers: HL, LVL, M. Everyone agrees that this should be our last D.O.R., though months after the debacle there is talk of a 5 year anniversary edition next year with cask strength Maker's to mark the occasion. WTF? We will see. There are before and after (bottle) photos but Blogger or my laptop are not cooperating today - the first time in over a year when I decide to post here, figures.

Prick points were assigned, trinkets were awarded and a badge of valor was on display straight from Loretto, KY. Then more prick points were awarded throughout the day. Lies are being spread at this very moment that yours truly is odds on favorite for 2015 POY but I can assure you this is a highly disputed farce of shit. The new POY trophy is missing some qualified, overdue names who are more worthy of this title.

Eve of Rage

The 2nd Annual Day of Rage is tomorrow, 4/20. Not what you would normally expect for that particular date but it works. This will be my first experience as a participant, one of only three confirmed, though others have been invited. There will be spectators too.

What is the Day of Rage, you ask. I hardly know myself. According to my written invitation it states "...three grown men will each consume a bottle of delicious Maker's Mark Whisky. What will follow is a terrifying descent into madness and debauchery". So there you have it, debauchery and madness. And drunkenness. There are also mentions of food, refreshments and yard-gaming. Not to mention poetry at halftime, whatever that means.

I like it. Looking forward to it. Hopefully we all survive and I can provide an update of events soon. Until then, cheers.

Don't Call It A Comeback

They've been here for years. Maker's Mark. 90 proof, unique and unwavering. Then they almost shit the bed and lost their customers.

Any bourbon drinking person I know heard the calamity that blew up roughly a month ago: Maker's made the huge announcement about reducing alcohol content to keep up with demand then all hell broke loose. Apparently their researchers didn't bother noticing what happened when Jack Daniels did the same thing several years back, resulting in ridicule and lots of loyal drinkers jumping ship. At least Maker's didn't gin up some false report saying their consumers demanded a more mellow, easy to drink whiskey like JD tried to foist upon us.

So after a week of public scorn, social media whipping and plenty of their previous PR efforts turned against them they came to the realization that things might be just fine the way they are. A logical choice for once. I applaud you, Maker's Mark. You made a bonehead decision and had the guts to admit it. Cheers.

Memorial Morning Bender

On a similar premise as Drunk Breakfast, behold Memorial Morning Bender. The idea is basically the same except for the fact that everyone already has the day off so there is no satisfaction of getting loaded and having excessive breakfast while the nine to fivers go to work. In this case we salute fallen service men and women on their holiday and raise a glass in their honor.

Round 1...the drinks

 

Round 2...the meal

Round 3...pics/comments from the drunkards

Downtown Grill & Brewery - Drinks and Smokes

DGB is hosting another one of those "hey, come and sip some whiskey samples and end up buying a shit ton more" tastings today.There will be music, cigars and of course product education and discussion for those who care about the finer details. Maybe some swag & trinkets, guest distiller, Demi or Jack? The Jim Beam family of spirits will be featured among others I would guess. Light up, drink and enjoy the show.

.

Rumor

Rumour if you are Canadian. We are told here that a new edition will be added to an existing and well-known bourbon line. This potent newcomer will be arriving to local bars as early as today. 130 proof is whispered. Get your shit together. Hmm. Where could it be? What could it be? I'll admit to being caught completely unaware. That's not so bad though when you think about it. Blee!

Much Better

The weekend was quite simply, tits. Significantly better weather around our region finally allowed us to get out for a small bender/binge and we made the most of it. DK sincerely hopes that all of you managed some outdoor fun even if it was -gasp- spent sober.

Even though the South, and Knoxville in particular was spared the worst of this bitter-ass winter cockbite, let's face it this winter largely sucked. Piss poor economy + cold = meh. The Whisky Season endures of course, and private consumption of the brown was still very high but yours truly found himself finding less time for usual barhopping and much more time for drink specials and HH. With warmer weather around the corner(looking at you groundhog) we can expect to resume publican behavior and we'll let you know who and what survived the recent bleak days.

As all of you know, the first warm days of the year will cause the cabin fever to break, and our once febrile minds will entertain all sorts of high-minded ideas for a Saturday bender. Keg drinking, Maker's, and a healthy appetite for all sorts of victuals.

Yeah, that's sushi. No, we didn't drink the bourbon out of the sauce containers you assholes. Look, it was predictably a strange combination but damn if we didn't eat all of it. Perfect example of how one of these benders can go south.

So with that in mind, let me encourage you to get your warm weather boozin' together and tie one on before springtime rolls in. Hit the back yard a few times to prep for the true rite of the season: Patio Drinking.

Meet the New Boss

http://www.fox41.com/story/13826074/one-on-one-bill-samuels-to-retire-from-makers-mark

Well, it was coming eventually. Also the stability of the family enterprise lends to a smooth (see what I did there?) transition. Good luck to Rob.

With Whisky Season approaching the home stretch, maybe its time to reassure MM that we're not going anywhere either. Time to a run to the package store.

O Whisky Season

Disturbing Trends in Dinner Prickery

So, this past weekend some members the group got the H out of dodge and pub crawled in a new town. There is something profoundly necessary about dealing with Holiday and impending winter related stress by taking one's shit on the road. A good rule is that at least one full day should be devoted to the crawl proper. Find a tasty Bloody Mary and then just go into the afternoon with an open mind. The details...such as those regarding our destination, fade into obscurity. Unnecessary even.

During these adventures, the mind often embraces its creative side. New things are tried, experimentation keeps everyone on their toes. Such was the setting for a Mackey-LVL contest of wills and livers.

The setting was a fine restaurant, where our group initially made reservations but always looking for the quickest way to continue the drinking(of course we started way before, don't judge us Puritan) we found a table in the lounge. Full service of course, or the victory is hollow. Time saved: 25 minutes from the initial reservation. We were victims of our own smug success, since we would have to slam our drinks seated.

To Mackey's initial surprise, I informed the server that we two gentlemen would need whisky shots-in a hurry. He didn't disappoint and those warm bastards arrived right before the salad.

LVL: 1, Mackey Nil. To be fair, I didn't enjoy the contrast in flavor either, but shit it had to be done. Pro-A strong opening move. Con-tasted like pain.

Not to be outdone, Mackey retaliates with a strong counter to the pre-salad bourbon: The mid-meal tequila. Nothing like chilled Patron to make you appreciate the next bite of prime rib or steak. The mouth is alternately confused and then grateful.

Pro-A devastating blow to my dinner morale. Con-sparks profanity in a setting unaccustomed to such prickery. LVL: 1, Mackey: 1. Push.

Final word? Neither of us want to go through that again. It was just pointless once everyone regained the faculty of civilized speech. No, I'll go further and admit it was a terrible idea. In summary, learn from the shitheaded behavior documented here. The lesson is that you should cockpunch your friends with a belt of Wild Turkey AFTER the last bite.

There I was completely wasting, out of work and down

Wasting? Yes. Out of work and down? No sir, although I am duly grateful during this foul oconomy. Thus with another Drinking for Vengeance in the books with the usual ceremonial JP lyric, we move into Whiskey Season right and proper on the first of December. During the holiday period with your exhaustive shopping and nauseating office parties, we remind you to hit the Makers, Jamesons, or Glenlivet early and often. Even if you only have a few minutes...and especially if you are at your wit's end with the droning shoppers and the hell of holiday traffic then its time to get stinko. You can find refuge nearly anywhere if you don't give in like a dandy.

Warm, inviting, non-judging...is there anything it can't do?

Tuesday

Yeah, so I've managed to acquire a bar globe. Nothing fancy, I didn't buy it airdrunk from Skymall or the Westerfield estate but it will serve in the beginning. Numerous early ideas about painting it like Unicron or the Death Star were bounced around. Like so much else, we just cut through the shit and accepted the status quo so as to get drinking "right damn now."



Not a particularly expensive or complex model, nonetheless the damn thing was lying in the motherfucking weeds and jumped up to wage hateful war against the group this last weekend! Much like Atlas and Mackey's dual kegerators that came before it the bourbon and vodka contained therein prosecuted our livers effectively. I am not confident of victory.

Did you know?

For our 400th post on this wretched midden heap, I would like to call your attention to one of the few things our government has done that we all can agree with: The creation of the Congressional Bourbon Caucus.

This nascent (a little over a year old) group is one of other 300 such caucuses in gummint. Largely formed from the Kentucky contingent, I'd like to see what their meetings are like.

Fortune and assorted leg-spreading

But the swift runner Achilles broke in sharply-"Field marshal Atreides, lord of men Agamemnon, produce the gifts if you like, as you see fit, or keep them back, it's up to you. But now-quickly, call up the wild joy of war at once!

-The Iliad, Book 19

Indeed. And so here we are, after some weeks of rumour and whispers we finally have the bottle of Maker's 46. Ye which is aged a bit longer with oak staves. Clever, and unsettling, for we are unaccustomed to fucking with a proven winner. After all, did Jack Daniels not buttfuck us?

We need not have worried. Thanks to our friends at Downtown-who even now stock this winner-I picked up one of these new bottles for the weekend. The wax is just like Maker's Mark proper, although we noticed that the wax seal on the front was somewhat curious. Getting the cork aside-Mackey, HL, and yours truly knocked back a few strong belts. The added oak adds smoothness, and although I feel it similar to other mid 90's proof bourbons you can tell that it's a big deal from a major distillery. It won't burn you up like the 100 plus motherfuckers either.

Thus, we addressed the afternoon...gulp by gulp, drink by drink building a wall of sweet numbness.

Handy the hand puppet: Even now, he sulks in his tree house like Achilles in his tent! ...Achilles?... The Iliad?... It's Homer?...

The Human Ton: Your Tick won't come. He's sulking in his tent like a guy from Chile!

Arthur: ...Don't you mean 'Achilles'?

Handy the hand puppet: [To the Human Ton] You're making us look like jerks! I told you already, READ A BOOK!

The Tick— "The Tick vs. Arthur's Bank Account"

Dear Lord, it was exhausting...ethos or no. The consensus of the smashed was that Maker's 46 is a worthy addition to the whisky family. At 94 proof it is slightly heavier than regular Maker's, and I cannot say that I would choose to pay the modest upcharge over the regular MM that I love so much.

Varenus rushes on briskly with his sword and carries the combat on hand-to-hand, and having slain one man, for a short time drove back the rest; while he urges on eagerly, he fell. To him, in turn Pulfio brings relief and both having slain a great number, retreat into the fort amidst the highest applause. Fortune so dealt with both in this rivalry that one competitor was a safeguard to the other, nor could it be determined which of the two appeared worthy of being preferred to the other.

Julius Caesar -Gallic Wars

So yeah, we got bombed. Spectacularly so, and with great vulgarity. Turns out there's a big X marking the spot beneath the seal. Insults were made, and wounds still fester. I think though we're going for wings in the morning so it's cool. Oh yeah, and if you are looking for a nice bourbon as a gift or just something different to sip on, pick up a bottle of 46. It'll nail your stones to the table. Cheers fuckface.

Sweet!

As you know, we are big Maker's Mark consumers. We've consistently chosen this winner for about a decade now due to its fine taste, great lore and tradition, and it's potent punch. But first, here's a picture taken from our recent trip to the Thunder Nationals.

The pineapple is emphasized. You can gauge this hefty bastard as a handle. We clobbered it, of course.

I digress, and now I get to my point. We Maker's Ambassadors have been told for months now to expect a new product from those fine people and we are thrilled with the release of "46" with the first bottles being dipped literally days ago. While it might be a while yet before we can drink them off the shelves, rest assured we'll give a full update.

Jefferson Mint Tea Julep

Check this out, over the weekend we watched the Kentucky Derby and enjoyed adult beverages as usual. No news there but we did try Jefferson’s Bourbon and I have to admit I’d not heard of it before. It was very, very good though and I see it becoming part of our standard rotation.
Tag Berauscht procured this product with intentions of making mint juleps, the exact mint juleps listed below, except subbing the Jefferson’s for the Makers Mark. Well, we adjusted the recipe a tad but ended up with a pretty good alternative. For some reason we decided not to have classic mint juleps and opted to use tea instead (I heard it was from a Rachel Ray recipe but don’t tell anybody). I think it basically ended up as a mint tea ice pick but with the addition of the simple syrup/mint extract.

Hell, I don’t know exactly but it turned out pretty good. We all enjoyed our single beverage and then started drinking straight for the bottle, natch. Jefferson’s is a smooth, easy-drinking bourbon that isn’t too complex or harsh. At 82 proof it won’t burn you down and has an even balance of spice and mellow flavors like vanilla and caramel. It’s worth a try next time you’re shopping for something new and don’t want to break the bank, it sells for less than $25.

Well Done

Really well done in fact, though not an aspect you’re aiming for when cooking pizza. Drunkenly cooking frozen pizza pie has cost me more lost pies than I can remember but probably fewer than our friend P. Sure, it works out most of the time, you come in from a night of boozing and think you just can’t make it without another meal before passing out. So you scavenge what’s available or become ambitious and cook something, often a frozen pizza in my case. Never mind that you just ate at the bar 2-3 hours ago. Get the pie in the oven, see what’s on TV while you wait – damn I’m comfortzzzzzz…..

Stink-O Alert!

Stink-O! Stink-O! Stink-O! It’s time to get stink-o. Tonight, TND via bourbon at my place. This is a call to all DK contributors, past or present, to gather and drink until the drinkin’s done. W.L. Weller requests your presence and attentive liver around 8 pm. Supplies are limited so be prepared to bring more booze or shuffle onward to the bar for backup drinks. That is all.

More To Come

A fine sample of the imminent bourbon season, well done LVL. They should call it Goodford Reserve.

If this a consular ship, where is the ambassador?

Or something like that. Anyway, tonight at the Downtown Grill & Brewery...affectionately truncated simply as "The Brewery" the good folks at Maker's Mark will be holding a small event for their aficionados-known as Ambassadors, of which yours truly and other close friends of this blog are proud (and card-carrying) members. This is the third such event we have attended at DGB in recent years...acquiring the inside knowledge of Maker's Mark products, lore, and their fine staff and family. It runs tonight from 5PM to 7PM in the official sense, although any reasonable drunkard will conclude their boozing business much, much later. Drop on by if you are in the area, or you can fuck off to another watering hole where you get two for one Bud Lights or similar lightweight faggotry that is usually reserved for dipshits.