Lunch Drinks

Ahhhh yes, nothing like a satisfying lunch few beers at noon to set you up for the day. One of the (not really) guilty pleasures I enjoy from time to time is having a cold beer or two with my first meal of the day, which is almost always at lunch since I don’t eat breakfast in the morning. It isn’t something I do very often, but I never deny myself the pleasure of enjoying a good brew if the mood strikes me. Frankly I’m surprised I don’t see more people doing the same thing, but more often I realize I’m the only person in the restaurant/pub that dares to have a drink during working hours. Sometimes I’m confused by the other diners’ expressions when they see me sipping a frosty one: Is that person glaring in my direction because I’m a dirty, drunk, loser alcoholic that has to drink to stop the ongoing shakes of delirium tremens, or is he envious because I have the gonads to order a beer with my sandwich while he gulps sweet tea or Dr. Pepper before skulking back to the office? Either way, I don’t care. I’m going to drink my damn beer, stare all you want.

America is a curious society; the South is even more so with all the religious nonsense and neighborly tradition of nosiness that pervades every aspect of our day to day lives (hence the anonymity of the authors). Why is it so damning to have a legal drink or two with lunch, and how did we reach this point? I guess you could cite the Protestant work ethic that shaped Western society, or the failed U.S. experiment that was Prohibition. These days it’s more likely employers’ insurance liability issues for that force an unjust work policy. Choose any theory you want, but these are modern times. Look at the Euros – those bastards out-drink us 2 or 3 to 1 per capita and they seem to be doing just fine. When I temporarily worked in London as a barkeep many years ago it wasn’t uncommon to see patrons have 4-5 beers for lunch before heading back to finish up for the day. The Germans have “biergartens” at the workplace. The Spaniards invented the siesta so they could go home to eat, drink and rest before coming back to work in the evening. The Irish……………. well never mind them. All I’m saying is that we’re too uptight compared to the rest of the Westernized world.

All of that speculative BS aside, there are just too damn many good foods that go with beer:

· Fish and chips
· Pizza
· Hamburger, cheeburger, chip chip chip
· Nachos
· Buffalo wings

Okay, those aren’t exactly the meals I have every day for lunch, but I bet you’re salivating right now wishing for one of them and your favorite beer. Chances are that if you’re reading this, you aren’t one of the snobby prudes sneering over your ice water at me as I quaff my IPA at lunch. But just maybe you’re one of those folks who are afraid to risk a brewski during work hours lest a coworker or friend of the boss rat your ass out and try to get you fired. Two words my friend: Fuck Them. You work hard and deserve your due. It isn’t like a beer or two is going to make you too drunk to function at your job, not after that ¼ lb cheeseburger and ½ lb of french fries sitting in your stomach. Go ahead and order a cold one, you’ll feel better for it. Trust me.

For those of you who wish to learn more about the fine art of drinking on the job I recommend you visit Modern Drunkard Magazine and learn from the masters of boozing.